RAW: Pathetic is, as Pathetic does.

Before I go over this week's Raw, I just wanted to say that listening to Lawler and Cole I realized how great it was to have Matt Striker help out at the Royal Rumble.

So we start the show off with the "R" Rated Superstar Edge. It was nice to see him back. He is one of my current favorites, along with Jerricho, CM Punk, Sheamus and the Miz (God, who thought I would ever say that?). I know reports are for Edge coming back as a Face, but I hope not. Some guys are just not good at being "good". Edge, Orton and Jerricho are on that list. After Edge's tirade against Jerricho and talk of who he should face at Wrestlemania, Sheamus comes out. Then it was time for WWE's favorite new game, "Let's make the champ look weak". Sheamus is left laying in the ring, motionless. I know what you are all thinking, "Hey, man this happens to Cena all the time before a match against someone". And that there is the key, this isn't before a match up with Edge. This is just another example of WWE putting over an established star at the expense of the "Young Buck" Champion.

So the matches tonight are all for the Elimination Chamber PPV. Looking at the matches there was really only one surprise, but then again, it wasn't a big one. I thought the Shatner segments were well done and funny. Especially him singing the WWE Entrance Music. I thought HHH was good in his segment, made light of himself. HBK, still brooding around. Unless he goes full out heel with this, it's going to get boring quick. Hey, look everyone it's the wimmins talking about how great a match they are going to have for the Diva's Championship. It's a match so great that no one will get to see it, because it didn't happen. So, um, what was the point of the segment? Hell with the length of most wimmins matches they could have not had the segment and had the match instead.

Match One: Cena vs Rhodes

I expected this to be a Squash Ala Cena, but pleasantly we got Rhodes putting on some decent offense, even though you, me, and my Siberian Husky all knew Cena was going to win. When the participants of this match was announced there was no doubt Cena would win.

Match Two: HHH vs Swagger

Once again there was no doubt the outcome, none...at...all. I was wondering is it just me or has HHH changed recently. He seems more willing to put guys over a little bit, does he see his time coming to an end at least in the ring? For example, in the Rumble match Trips took a lot of "finishers" from the younger guys in the match, even a Pedigree counter. It gave the younger guys a chance to look good and put little twinges of doubt into the outcome. Of course those twinges didn't last long. In this match with Swagger he did it again. For the most part Swagger dominated this match up. Of course Trips did pull out the "babyface" win.

Match Three: Orton vs HBK

I was a little surprised at this match for about half a second then I realized of course this is how it had to be. Either this way or HHH vs HBK, and of course Trips went last match. To keep HBK's half crazy angry heel turn he had to lose this match and it had to look like he was going to win. I've said it once and I'll say it again, it HBK goes full heel with this is will be good, if he goes halfassed face with it, it will be boring. I mean come on let's face it really he can go full blown face because we all know that after WM, he will be gone for a few months.

Match Four: DiBiase vs Henry

This was the only match that I wasn't sure of who would pull out the win. Of course there has been talk of DiBiase getting a bit of a push, a leaked DiBiase sans Legacy post on WWE.com, but it's been dragging ass to get here. So I was giving DiBiase a 30% chance of winning here. I thought DiBiase looked good. I like the older school approach of singling out a body part to work on. It's a little in ring storytelling that you don't see much of anymore and that's mainly because the idiots in the audience will start chanting "boring" because they are either young or stupid, either way they don't know any better.

Match Five: Big Show vs Kofi

Again there was no doubt as to the winner. Big Show is just, well, he's just too Big for the Elimination Chamber match. I thought this match was bad. Kofi is not strong enough to carry Show. Well, not really carry, but Show needs someone that can make him look good so he can make them look good. And WWE's new resident spot blowing monkey isn't the one. I watched him blow at least three moves in this match up alone. Plus, the eye poke ending was worse than almost any Dusty finish. I guess that was the only way to give Kofi a win and still make Show look strong. I didn't like Show adamant "it was a mistake" It gives him another reason to be angry.

So for the Elimination Chamber PPV, in just three weeks as we were constantly reminded during the show, we get three Usual Suspects, and two Wild Cards. I think if I was booking it, I would have had Cena and Trips lose. I know WWE is thinking PPV buys, but they could have put Cena, Trips and HBK in some type of match at Elimination Chamber for buys and given the young guys a chance to shine.

You know I've never been that big of a Bret Hart fan. Now I appreciate his former in ring skills, the storytelling and generalship, but I feel that Owen Hart is the one who got the charisma. Let's face it what Vince said was correct. Bret definitely has no charisma. For the last million years I've grown tired of Bret's whining about the wrestling world being against him. Whining about Montreal, whining about Goldbergs kick. Maybe he had reason to do so in the past, but sometimes you have to let shit go or you just become a bitter shell of what you once were. If he wants to whine about something it should be the mistake he made of going to WCW so he could just be buried under the boot of the NWO.

So with half of a heavy heart I watched as Bret Hart limped to the ring. I watched as he did his pose with a left hand that could barely move. I watched him give Vinnie Mac what for and then he started talking about not wanting to be pathetic. The only thought that went through my mind when he attacked Vince, could hardly move his foot to attempt a Sharpshooter, and how sad he looked when Batista was holding him, was that he looked pathetic. There are other ways this storyline could be done. Managing the Hart Dynasty would have been great. Or having the Board of Directors make him the General Manger of RAW, thus getting rid of the stupid Guest Hosts.

The Good

-It was nice to see a good amount of matches that were of decent length. No real squashes, even if the results were never in doubt.
-MVP attacking the Miz. I'm liking this feud a lot. They are building it very well. Nice verbal sparring a few weeks ago, Miz constantly coming out on top, the Royal Rumble match which gave the Miz the win, then the attack on Raw by MVP. A nice slow build that will end with the inevitable, MVP United States Champion.
-Only a few seconds of Hornswaggle and no comedy bits, other than Shattners, which were well done.

The Bad

-Michael Cole and Jerry Lawler. Cole is just irritating and Lawler just sucks now. I mean really Cody Rhodes looks so much like Orton that you can't get his name right? It's bad that you make the mistake once, but to do it constantly in one form or another it pitiful. Come on Jerry it's time to take you out behind the barn. What? No, that's not a shotgun.
-The Wimmins segment, there was no need for it, at all.
-Bret Hart's beat down. I really don't know who's to blame here. Hart for agreeing to it, or Vince for making a broken down shell of his former self wrestler look even more broken down. I was never his biggest fan, but just like when I see Ric Flair it makes me sad. Heroes aren't supposed to get old.